SEPTEMBER 1

1939 10:00 To-day there were air-raids over Polish cities. – Hitler seems to be determined to carry out his plans. – Thank God I live in America! – It doesn’t seem like anything can prevent a general European war now- I hope we can stay out of it!

1940 10:35 I hope I live through tomorrow – I feel so ignorant. But I’ve got to build up the ego + grit the teeth and live till the weekend

1941 Mon It was good to be with Marie + Chils – More than ever I want to be clean and wholesome + vital… It is certainly their greatest asset. I am much too self-centered and melancholy. There is no sense to it.

1942 TUES DAVID STOPPED BY TONIGHT TO APOLOGIZE FOR LAST NIGHT… I TOLD him IT WAS QUITE UNNECESSARY… HE WANTED TO FIND OUT IF I REALLY MEANT WHAT I SAID… and WAS SURPRISED WHEN HE FOUND I DID.

1943 WED

AUGUST 27

1939 Sunday – Should I go, or shouldn’t I – tomorrow will tell! – I think I will (if he’s under 32!) – Worked (?) on Mannekin design – played a little desultory bridge at Marguerite’s – she asked me what I wanted out of life – “Everything” is about as confining as I can get –

1940 Tues Well, he didn’t let me down. Propositioned me right up to the end. Suggested we take apt. in Le Mars. I laughed at him, told him I hoped he wasn’t serious (I know he was). Went to Dentist, cut my hair (I hated to) + went out to Fosters turned my job over to Bob. I’d like to h

1941 Wed Mother + I went down town this A.M. – ate lunch at Shrivers’ + saw Bette Davis flicker. Was over at Eide’s. bought Pete a red crew shirt

1942 THURS 10:30 I’M GETTING FED UP with THIS UNEVENTFUL existence! [THERE’S A PERFECT moon] … WISH Stan OR SOMEONE HAD CALLED… DAVE WAS OUT AT SCHOOL THIS AFTERNOON; GUESS I WAS A little TOO PREOCCUPIED… HAD TO redo BLUE WALLS… PAINTED ART ROOM with SHIRLEY and BOB

1943 FRI

AUGUST 13

1939 Sun Went swimming this morning cold! – perfect! – But I was tired the rest of the day. Marg + I had planned a picnic for Virg. And Minnie. It was rather successful – I feel quite awful –

1940 11:15 I feel like I had a ruptured appendix – however I’m sure its because I ate too much for dinner. Bob + Leonard + I lay out on the campus this morning.

1941 Wed My throat is sore… Started on some sketches, finally. Takes me too long… trotted downtown after a paint brush. – saw Donna

1942 THURS I had a wisdom tooth pulled; didn’t phase me as I expected it to… Went out to school… Leonard was verbally demonstrative… Went to the dance w/ David… Was bored and stupid…

1943 FRI

AUGUST 11

1939 12:00 Started on the dummy of the yearbook today – I’m not as scared as I was. Mr. Bailin asked me to write the ad for the newspaper another element of the new shop! I’m glad… We played bridge at Terry’s

1940 1:15 Perhaps it would have been less dangerous to have gone out w/ Bill tonight (or Hunk) Howard took pictures this morning + we ran them tonight… He said he wished the 1940 Edda were to do over! My God.

1941 12- I hope I’ve done the right thing. I’ve decided to stay at Auggie. Talked w/ Mr. Eide + Granskau. They were so swell. I have a lot to live up to… Leonard’s brother was killed in Chicago. I feel so bad… He is away..

1942 11:00 GEE, Baby, WE DIDN’T DO MUCH with TODAY * WENT SWIMMING with DAVID… (date for thurs.) GOT BURNED – VAMPED A 4 yr OLD BOY… WENT out TO SCHOOL; DIDN’T see MISTER PAYNE

1943 WED

AUGUST 7

1939 Well, B. Barron got along without me to-night! (And I thought I really might go) – Mother + I went down town to-day saw the circus parade. She bought a rose wool skirt + material for a dress! I worry about the yearbook – I wish I’d get going on it!

1940 Merely muddled around today – I’ve got about 5 letters to write – keep procrastinating – Leonard identified my cologne today. I’m surprised he remembered it – I hope it doesn’t rain for the picnic…

1941 Thurs Do tell, I really got here! Eleanor had been worried about me, of course! – We ate at the Town House. Sat up on the roof + talked tonight

1942 FRI Oh BABY, WE’RE crazy… WENT HUNTING FROGS WITH AL NORLIN, R.H.#, S.J.M. and MISTER Payne. WE COULDN’T FIND A SINGLE one! – I GOT CAUGHT ON A BARBED WIRE FENCE and GOT MY FEET all MUDDY… WENT with PEGGY FOR HER MUSIC LESSON AND LISTENED TO sharp ECSTASY of Walkyrie… ALWAYS THINK of LEONARD. WENT SWIMMING W. DAVID…

1943 SAT.

AUGUST 2

1939 11:25 Managed to accomplish quite a bit today + not mind it!) In fact, I enjoyed myself! I’ve got to finish out at school, this wk. (Leonard was out today)

1940 (ditto – very much so – acutely so in fact) Well darn Bill – Clara saw him today. He has been out with Hazel! Got some borders fixed for Fosters finally – Bob, Dick H. + I talked, sang, rounds – listened to D. play Boogie Woogie He is brilliant. Too bad Leonard missed out. Spence was out again.

1941 Sat Wow – what a day. Helped strike 3:00 set tonight – talked with Barney – put on my formal + went to the party – sleeping with Lois tonight. Steven has our room

1942 SUN WE HAD 2 awfully SWEET SOLDIERS TO DINNER…MOTHER “PICKED THEM UP” AT CHURCH… WORE MY NOO PINAFORE… WENT UP TO DELL RAPIDS WITH David… PLEASANT enuff AFTERNOON; BUT I SHOULD HAVE LET WELL ENOUGH ALONE… WE GOT BORED BEFORE THE EVENING WAS over. I WAS sad.

1943 MON

JULY 30

 1939 Sunday 12:00 Muddled. Felt upset all morning finally got to work over my dr. board. Karl + D + Mary + Lee were over – Eleanor + I went to a movie – I just finished reading Jamaica Inn

1940 1:45 I wish I had stayed home – I wish to hell I’d stayed home… Lousy picnic… “my friends” wanted to drive up to Luverne. Which was certainly all right. They had such fun dancing with pickups – which wasn’t all right. I was absolutely nauseated.

1943 11:30 Got a special from Eleanor this morning. Wants to know when I'll be in Chicago! - I wrote her to come to New York. - Gee, I hate to make decisions. They asked me to stay + play in "Hey Fever" - Would almost like to -

1942 THURS ha – DAVY THOUGHT I WAS A LITTLE HIGH ON ONE Tom Collins… (GEE HE SHOULD HAVE WITNESSED MY CAPACITY LAST NIGHT!) WE WENT TO THE OPENING of THE INSTRUCTORS’ CLUB! QUITE FUN… MET A LT. COLONEL… FROM TEXAS. GEE Davy IS A JEALOUS one…

1943 FRI MY DRESS CAME FROM HOME. IT FITS BEAUTIFULLY, HOW MOTHER DOES IT. I COULD HARDLY TALK TODAY, MY THROAT WAS SO SORE. WE FOLIO-ED THE BOOK… MRS. Stote TOLD US ABOUT PARIS + LONDON – I CAN’T QUITE FEATURE HER RELATIONSHIP w/ HER husband!

JULY 28

1939 10:30 – Every night, I’m tired – all I ever want to do is sleep – Karl + Dorothy  - M R + Lee + babes were over for dinner tonight It was slightly bedlam-ated. Ruth brought me a little pin from Alaska

1940 11:45 if I had gone to Plymouth I’d have been due there today – I don’t know how I could ever have financed it – I hope it will be different next year! – I went up to the lake with the folks – it’s so marvelous up there I’d like to go + relax – utterly for about a week – I talked w/ Margie + V. tonight too much

1941 3:00 God, what a day! We started at 9:30 this morning + just finished now; I’m finished too. Rain, barn, sleepy, stomach ache.

1942 TUES Donna Jean CAME BY + WE PICKED UP MICKY AND WENT FOR A RIDE.. JOHN WAS HERE WHEN WE GOT BACK…. HE’S SELFISH… LIKES US TO HIMSELF… MOTHER + I BAKED COOKIES… CHOCOLATE… ummm… DAVID CAME OVER THIS AFTERNOON… HE WAS MAD! WE WENT swimming. R.H. # + LEONARD + I WENT DOWN TOWN

1943 WED Felt simply foul today. My throat’s sore… Came home, bathed, felt better. Listened to President, washed clothes. I think I’ll go to bed for a change. Mother wrote + Austin Killian!

 

JULY 19

1939 Wed Nessa ragged me all day about my Mon. night experience in the backseat – I’m still having no serious pangs of conscience – tonight I went to Denis’s Concert – Ray’s suggestion (he was selling tickets) And who should sit beside me but Leonard – (I hope Ray saw him!)

1940 Well I hope I fixed Spence… We drove up to Luvesne – I was perfectly okay except I only said about 3 words all evening. – If he calls again, I swear I’m not going out with him… I saw a light in Bill’s window when we went by.

1941 ? Well, Jim certainly doesn’t waste any time… I suppose he figured he might as well play for the highest stakes… I was surprised – Just naïve, I guess. After the show we went down to White House. Sat on the beach – breezy – dark – swell.

1942 SUN WE WERE OVER TO DINNER AT Bryant's this AFTERNOON. D.J. and I SUN-BATHED, LATER. THEN WENT OUT TO THE COTTAGE AFTER A COKE. JOHN + WILBER TOOK THE HARDERS’ TESTS over THERE – THEY CAME HOME w/ ME. DAVE WAS OVER AT 11:00 (I’D JUST GOTTEN UP – TO SEE IF I HADN’T RELENTED!)

1943 MON LEONARD WRITES THAT HE’S BEEN ACCEPTED FOR A S.TP. – WON’T GO – BECAUSE OF EMINENCE OF SHIPPING + CONSEQUENT FREEZING of PERSONNEL… IT ISN’T RIGHT… DAMN… I FEEL BEATEN… ELEANOR AND I WENT TO “MORE THE MERRIER”… I COULDN’T CONCENTRATE…

 

JULY 17

1939  Monday And Duke Ellington with Leonard and I wasn’t expecting too much of the evening… It turned out super + + + - Thank goodness, I didn’t see Ray there – Leonard was certainly no slouch – I like him – He said, when he brought me to the door that he could not figure me out – I wasn’t like any other date he’d had out – Maybe I made a hit ? ? ?

1940 Wed W the rat didn’t call as he said he would tonight… I suppose he will care tomorrow when I not ready to go to the dance… I am just furious – Spence came over this afternoon and “nailed me down” for a date for Friday – He is so supremely conceited

1941 Well, darling *, I wish I could have about an hour alone with you tonight. I really need it. Morale was nil… Rained… Phooey I loathe the play I’m in next week. *Leonard.

1942 FRI WENT TO THE [DANCE with DAVID crossed out) … MOVIE Noontide WITH VIRGINIA, PEGGY, J.C. + “JUKE”. GOLLY, I’M GLAD I’M POOR IF THAT’S WHAT MONEY DOES FOR YOU… hmmm, I LAK – JEAN GABIN..

1943 SAT OH-H-H, WAS I SEEK WHEN I GOT OUT OF THE Barbizon POOL…! DIDN’T THINK I’D BE ABLE TO GET HOME; I RILLY didn’t. “Edith” AND I DID THE HOUSEWORK. WE GOT ALONG FINE… I WROTE HOME, THAT’S ALL READ Point Counterpoint FELT PRETTY BAD.

 

JULY 16

1939 Sunday 12:10 After exactly a month – Ray called up - ! He is going to work on the R.R. again – We went to the race in Luverne to-night… I felt rather odd - + didn’t say much… on the way back he asked me if I could possible like him a little, again – He said he couldn’t explain why he hadn’t called me before, etc – It was the old thrill once more –

1940 Painted woodwork, etc today – (If I don’t get to work + make some money - ) Went to N.W. Passage w/ Hunk… He looked so nice tonight – all 200 pounds of him… I thought about B.C. most of the day… wonder if he’s serious… Should I go out w/ him tomorrow ? ? ?

1940 ? Hell, I wish I were home. Got a lousy Cockney Part in Fannie – which is a very dully play – Wish I were in Cradle Song!

1941 THURS WENT TO THE DANCE WITH DAVID… WE WERE ALL OUT SWIMMING – SHIRLEY, BOB, RON, PEGGY – etc. – AND I SAW HIM, THEN… HE’S VERY NICE, I THINK… AND I MUST HAVE made AN IMPRESSION on HIM.

1942 FRI OH DUST + ASHES… I’M INFINITELY DEPRESSED. BUT BETTER, WHEN I CAME HOME AND FOUND A LETTER. HE STILL DOESN’T KNOW! ( I THINK I WORRY MORE THAN HE DOES!) ALL DAY I HURRIED AND DIDN’T GET A CHANCE TO WRITE. 

JULY 12

1939 10:10 Worked 6 hrs today, walked 3 times (6 miles) + went swimming We go almost every noon – tonight, Mother + I have been talking about fixing over Wilmer’s old room for me- I hope I can do it

1940 Friday 10:30 – I was seriously unhappy this afternoon – mostly because I was tired, I guess. Bill + I went out to his folks house (to feed the dog!) – He wants an “all day” date for Sunday. I agreed, but I don’t know.

1941 2:15 Thank God that show’s over. – insects are buzzing in my ear. – a skunk lurks around our door-sill – we had a wild time getting home – I feel in character for my next part!

1942 SUN “MET” DAVID… (THAT WAS RILLY A SMOOTH PICK-UP, IF EVER I SAW ONE) – SHIRLEY, PEG + I WENT SWIMMING – MAYBE IT WAS MY RED SUIT. WE HAD SUPPER OVER AT PEG’S, THE CAME OVER + SAT IN OUR BACK YARD; JOHN K + J. de R. CAME OVER + STAYED and TALKED TO ME…

1943 MON Leonard wrote a dark, resentful letter, I hate his having to feel that way. Oh God, please let him have a chance… Had to come home this noon I felt so bad. Better, as the day wore on. We had steak.