THE END

Dear Readers,
Well, the circle is closed - you can find October 26 in the archive, my first post on this blog. It has been an interesting project. I feel so close to my grandmother now, at least to her in the years of her diary, when she was 20-26 years old.
I'll continue to fiddle with "Five Year Diary" so don't stop checking in! And thanks to all who've taken the time to read.
Best,
Anna
p.s. - Check out Make Magazine's article about this blog in their latest issue! http://makemag.com/issues/

OCTOBER 25

1939 Started revising “Slipping Beauty” at 6:30 – had to read it in cr. Writing to-night. – went over okay. – We had to wait for Ray to bring the car back. – All Carp can talk about is the brainchild… “Picampus”

1940 2:00 OH GOOD, GOOD… BED, HOME, AND STUFF – ALMOST HATED TO LEAVE – KIDS LIKE BRICK MAKE ME WANT TO STAY – (GEE, HE IS PRACTICALLY AS OLD AS LEONARD) BOB, EMIL + L. CAME OVER AFTER THE GAME TONIGHT, STAYED LATE… I LOVE THEM… ALL I GET FROM LEONARD IS INNUENDOS… HE TOUCHED MY HAND FOR A MOMENT… WILL HE EVER RELENT?

1941 Sat Low-ebb – then Jo called… We went out to school + confided in the Art Room over cokes + potato chips. Lovely afternoon spent on the Civic Theater’s “sets” –foo

1942

1943

OCTOBER 24

1939 12:00 – Heard Buck Whittmore + Jack Loew’s piano concert. – Rosalind introduced us afterwards. – It was really a thrill – Marg + Sari + I ate down town together – I find my “lesson plans” are not complete enough.

1940 11:30 THANK GOD IT’S FRIDAY TOMORROW! – AND DADDY’LL BE AFTER ME AT 4:00 – GEE, I HOPE WE GET HOME EARLY! – I WISH I WERE SPENDING THE WEEK-END AT HOME, NOT GOING UP TO STATE. BUT MAYBE I’LL HAVE SOME FUN ANYHOW – TODAY WAS PRETTY BAD – IF ONLY I’D FIGURE OUT WHAT I’M GOING TO TEACH FROM ONE DAY TO THE NEXT! – OHH, I HAD A DATE TONIGHT – BUT HE DOESN’T DANCE!

1941 11:00 Well, I better start in on the agony haven’t written for weeks… Dusted this morning… could barely get to school… Peggy B + I had a wild time getting out this aft too! – D.J. went down to Civic Theater – Got enlisted

1942 1:20 [JUST ONE MORE NIGHT ON THE DAVENPORT, THANK HEAVEN!] GEE, I LOVE JUST BEING WITH Leonard… WE WENT TO “Tales of MANHATTAN”… SAT DOWN AT THE Chocolate Shop UNTIL 11:00, WALKED HOME IN THE COLD, MOONLIT NIGHT… THE FOLKS WERE STILL UP, SO WE WERE SLIGHTLY frustrated… BUT NOT SERIOUSLY… I STEPPED neatly OFF MY SHIFT scaffolding – SPILLED PAINT ALL OVER. MY STYLE-SHOW FRIEND STOPPED IN AT THE Tip Top. TOO HIGH-PRE.

1943

OCTOBER 23

1939 12:00 First day is over, thank heaven – My back is broken in two, otherwise, not so bad. – Bob + I went to the lecture (Graham Cary) tonight. – Afterwards, Bob, Leonard + Bill + I talked over the whole thing at the Choc. Shop. – I saw Max Baer!

1940 Gee, I never thought, then; I’d be really in this racket! – sometimes now I can’t quite feature it. – Rather a depressing day on the whole – Except, tonight we heard Richard Crooks and got his autograph after the program. –

1941 Thurs Bob was over for Dinner – Bill + Olga – Phil. – We played bridge with Mother + Daddy.

1942 FRI DIDN’T PAINT TODAY; ENLARGED SKETCHES (VILLAIN and HEROINE, BRED IN OL’ KENTUCKY) ALL DAY + TONIGHT, too… OFFERED TO HELP Leonard SCREEN POSTERS, BUT BOARDS DIDN’T COME – PAYOFF: SERGEANT Neely – MARINE RECRUITING OFFICER TRIED TO GET AHOLD OF ME THIS AFTERNOON… M’FRIEND MISTER GROSS CALLED TONIGHT… I’M TO MEET HIM tomorrow.

1943

OCTOBER 22

1939 11:30 Sun. Tomorrow, and I start my P. Teaching. I’ve been trying frantically to “be prepared” – I hope I am… I hope I’m not a flutter brain… If there’s anything I admire in a person it is serenity!

1940 GEE, I’M A SLUGGARD… LOOKS LIKE I’LL BE TEACHING BY DIVINE INSPIRATION AGAIN – WENT TO LOUSY (FORGIVE ME) TEACHERS BRIDGE CLUB. I AIN’T A FITTIN IN – WHEN I WAS DYING TO GO TO THE HIGH SCHOOL DANCE… YIMMINY I FELT GOOD – IT SOON WORE OFF AFTER ABOUT 20 HANDS OF BRIDGE… BOB + BRICK CAME IN AND TALKED TO ME AFTER SCHOOL. I’VE GOT TO WATCH OUT!

1941 Wed “Sophomore Soiree” – Chils + I enjoyed ourselves immensely – Dorm Dinner – I was late + slipped off the diet! – tsk tsk

1942 THURSDAY TOOK ELEANOR + NETTE TO LUNCH… WILMER and OLGA WERE OVER FOR PHEASANT… THE ADMIRER of TUES. NIGHT TURNED OUT TO BE A PUBLICITY DIRECTOR of MIAMI BILTMORE – HE THINKS I SHOULD BE A MODEL! – hm… OF COURSE, HE WANTED A DATE… I WROTE TO STAN TONIGHT… TOO BAD I DIDN’T MAKE IT TO NEW YORK SOONER… DID “DOWN WENT McClosky

1943

OCTOBER 21

1939 Sat Is it possible this is another Sat already? – I completed my frescoe panel for techniques – (a red-headed native girl! ) – And Sary + I went to a Mickey Rooney – “Babes in Arms’ – I wish I’d have a date tomorrow – a real date (phooey on platonics!)

1940 THANK GOD, MONDAY’S OVER… LOUSY SKIT… HAP-HAZARD TEACHING… INSTEAD OF WORKING, WROTE LETTERS TONIGHT.. OH WELL, WHAT THE HELL! – I ALMOST GOT SICK TO MY STOMACH PUTTING UP THAT REVOLTING EXHIBIT… GEE, AND THE KIDS WILL BE TOLD THAT IS “ART”

– OH – H – H!

1941 Tues Claustrophobia – should have written letters instead of knitting tonight –

1942 WED WAS OVER TO ALL SAINTS for DINNER… MET A VERY MARVELOUS Scotch GAL… ONLY 3 MONTHS OVER FROM England* … MADE THE War VERY CLOSE FOR ME… RHODA IS TO BE MARRIED 31st… LEAVES FRIDAY… WE HAD AN ALMOST OPPRESSIVELY ARISTOCRATIC EVENING - * SHE’S MARRIED TO A Dutch NAVAL LIEUTENANT.

1943

OCTOBER 20

1939 Fri I really studied all aft. – getting started on teaching materials – If I can get things lined up smoothly It hadn’t ought to be so difficult. – Eleanor is job-hunting, she says. –

1940 SUNDAY – Gee, meant to do something tonight BUT BOB + HARLEY CAME AND TOOK ME FOR A RIDE… THEY ARE CRAZY, SWEET KIDS – BUT MIGOSH – SUCH EXPERIENCE. I THINK ITS AWFUL I FELT SO NICE ALL DAY… WENT TO CHURCH WITH MRS. REEVES – SHE IS V. SWEET – ASKED ME TO DINNER – TOOK HER TO “HOWARDS OF VA.” – FINALLY WROTE TO MOTHER + ELEANOR!

1941 Wed Spoke at Philo – Then helped pick a glammer gal with Mr. Spitznagel at a local cow. – talked w/ (Mr. Spitznagel)… good

1942 TUES WE WERE BOTH too TIRED TO GO – BUT WE WENT TO THE DANCE… Leonard STOPPED IN AFTERWARD… I WAS PRETTY SCARED THE FIRST COUPLE TIMES DOWN THAT Ramp – BUT I FELT adequately GLAMOROUS… AND HAD FUN… WAS SORRY Leonard COULDN’T SEE ME IN THOSE SEXY PYJAMAS… OF COURSE, HE GOT THERE too LATE. I BARELY GOT READY IN TIME… MY hair WAS HARDLY dry.

1943

OCTOBER 19

1939 Thurs. – Was up to H.S. to-day. – I adore Lois Cowan… Saw Marg after school. We had cokes in the Huddle + talked about pr. teaching. She has 10 hrs in already. – Marguerite came over to-night, as I didn’t get much done –

1940 12:00 Slaved all day. It was perfectly beautiful out and I begrudged the time I spent inside… Got a box of candy from Eleanor and wedding pictures from Howard… I would give anything to hear from Leonard – I hope I can sleep till about 9:00 it makes me so mad I always wake up about 6:45!

1941 Sun Got home abt 7:00 – Palace, cokes. Went to church w/ Mrs. R. – ate a huge Sunday dinner. – talked w/ Blanche + Allan, Lorraine + Alberta.

1942 MON WE HAD A REHEARSAL tonight AT THE COLISEUM… THOSE BABES RATHER GIVE ME A PAIN; they’re TOO DAMN GOOD LOOKIN’ + CONSEQUENTLY MAKE NO ATTEMPT AT ANYTHING else! V.VOSS BROUGHT ME HOME… Leonard DIDN’T CALL ME…

1943

OCTOBER 18

1939 We didn’t have class to-day night so I didn’t read my “story” – Carp took me to the show + then Bob + Donna J + Leonard + I went on a “picnic” on a vacant lot.

1940 Got to go to the game tonight after all – Unfortunately, it was not the Eilers number but a completely blind number – I’m sure I won’t go out with him again Even if he’s 6’3”, has a Lincoln Zephyr + would take me around plenty. He has a fat, mean face and also a wife whom I’m not even sure is divorced!

1941 Sat Gee, swell… Went to G.W.S. H. rehearsals, talked w/ Eve, saw Landey – who’s swell. – Saw Betty she makes me ill – Sleeping in “front bedroom”

1942 SUN BOB R. + I WENT TO the MAJOR + the MINOR. HE IS HIGHLY INTELLIGENT; AND NICE – CERTAINLY DOESN’T STIMULATE ME OTHERWISE THAN intellectually, THOUGH…

1943

OCTOBER 17

1939 Tues – “Observed” all day course at the high school I start teaching Monday! – I have to start something for Cr. Writing

1940 11:30 Well, I really didn’t dream I’d be “in it”. If I had, I might have been more really “observant” … Dear Heaven, what a day! Don’t think I can stand many more like it… Got mad for the first time!… Larry suddenly infuriated me… Thank goodness I didn’t say or do anything I’d be sorry for… quit teaching – Skit tonight… Bought Bob Rees a round again.

1941 Fri – I’m so glad I came – really a reception. – I was thrilled – (for a change) – parade – coronation – marvelous game – Dance – Blanche is upset again

1942 SAT 1:45 A PICNIC WITH LARRY + DONNA… MORE BEER AND CONVIVIALITY… A HUGE FIRE… WE WENT TO THE ORPHEUM FIRST; WE ENJOY BEING ALONE together… I HAD 3 OTHER CHANCES FOR DATES TONIGHT – BUT NONE COMPARE WITH Leonard.

1943

OCTOBER 16

1939 7:50 – And back to school again! – The week-end seems a million years ago – I did a lay out and put my scratch coat on m' fresco panel to-day. – Want to write to Eleanor + Nessa – But I must start to write something for creative writing Wed.

1940 11:30 Gee, I wanted to make it before this. – But we had a B. party for Janet out to the DelMar – We also had cocktails served to us up at the apartment! I hope my surprise didn’t show all over my face… I felt pretty swell today. Hope Brenda + Cabin go off all right tomorrow!

1941 Thurs – I guess maybe I’ll go to LeMars tomorrow – I washed my clothes out. – I told D.J. about everything. I think she likes Leonard, too

1942 FRI 2:00 I WAS PRACTICALLY IN A COMA, I WAS SO TIRED – BUT BOB + VIRGINIA WANTED A PICNIC, SO WE WENT ON ONE – out TO Sherman. I WOULD HAVE PREFERRED TO skip THE NIGHT CLUBS.

1943

OCTOBER 15

1939 1:30 Inevitably tomorrow brings reality + its immediate problems – Managed to make the Philo-Web alumnae breakfast. Came home + slept till time for tea. – Wore my formal for last time for awhile – I hope. Went out for a picnic – Donna + I talked till 1:30. I like her so much!

1940 11:00 Well, I lasted. Went pretty good… Is this all going to be “clawing up a cliff” like this? – God, I hope not. – I feel like it would be a good deal if they would let me snooker out between semesters if that job works out in Minneapolis – Gee, I wish it would! – Grades recorded tonight – What a mess!

1941 Wed Creative Wr. – Krause got off on a tangent. Wilber + Emil insisted on walking all the home w/ me.

1942 THURS

1943 FRI I WENT TO THE PROM ON THE Prairie State WITH VIC… IT RILLY NICE… GEE, THOSE BOYS LOOKED SO CLEAN, SO YOUNG, SO good. I FEEL POOHED OUR… VIC GOT OUT OF WEEK-END WATCH BY TELLING THE C.O. THAT “HIS GIRL WAS COMING FROM SOUTH DAKOTA!” IMAGINE… AND, WHAT’S MORE, I WAS INTRODUCED TO HIM IN THAT CAPACITY! MY FEET ARE A MESS. HEARD FROM KRIK.

OCTOBER 14

1939 4:00 Tonight I sleep alone – Eleanor is on her way to Chicago – I’ll miss her horribly… To-day Convocation – my luncheon – helped E pack – got ready for banquet – went – (3/4 of an hr late!) (W.W.) – Bob + Donna + Leonard + I were over at D’s house + drank home-made wine + talked till (4:00) I’ll never forget it.

1940 1:45 WELL, UTLEY – I HOPE WE CAN LAST THROUGH TOMORROW! GEE, YOU DID A SLOPPY JOB ON GRADING – BUT AT LEAST THEY’RE FIGURED OUT – HAPHAZARD OR NOT! – THE PRESSURE IS BEING PUT ON – I WISH I WERE READY FOR IT – MIGHT BE FUN – SKIT “ART EXHIBIT” – (UGH) – STAGE SETS – WHAT NEXT! DON’T I EVER GET TO PLAN MY COURSES?

1941 Tues – Lousy Lecture – Leonard again. “Good Night” – I know he has very broad shoulders. I looked at them all during speech

1942 WED LEONARD HAD DALE’S CAR. WE COULDN’T GET IT STARTED IN TIME TO GO AFTER DONNA; SHE WANTS US TO GO ON A PICNIC Satiddy… I ADORE Leonard… HOW CAN THIS EVER end?

1943 THURS THE DAY I GOT THE NASTY CINDER IN MY EYE… GEE, IT WAS EXCRUCIATING… VIC TOOK ME TO THE MIDSHIPMEN’S SHOW IT WAS DARN GOOD… MY FRIENDS WHO WANTED A DATE, WERE THERE. AND WITH GELS. WORKED ON THE COVER.

OCTOBER 13

1939 and so its over – The Coronation – Everything went perfect – Wagner and walking down the aisle with Margaret and our gowns + the stage – all perfect. – Bob + I had so much fun to-gether at the Virginia afterwards with Beer

1940 11:40 (It’s too bad, but I’m just too tired to correct the rest of these papers!) – Gee, what a week-end… Margaret + Kenny are married. This is once she had to do something with out me – seems incredible they are married. It was perfectly beautiful – Everything – I loathed coming back here… But I guess I can hold out awhile – Gee, but I’m swamped.

1941 Mon – Hell… Why does he have to be so Goddamn impersonal if he feels the way he did last night?

1942 TUES

1943 WED

OCTOBER 12

1939 11:30 We went down and tried few coats on at Wermuth’s afterwards, we went out to school + coked ate the huddle – Helped Bob + Leonard + Ruth on the stage till 5:00 B + L wanted to go to show Eleanor leaves day after tomorrow

1940 2:30 Gee, this seems normal, now. – (I wish I could sleep about 14 hrs) I am sick I’m so tired… My day was a trifle unsuccessful… Gee, I don’t know what was the matter. I guess it’s another case of over-anticipation… We lost our H. game… Hugo gave speech at the banquet tonight I had 2 chances for dates – But not with L.

1941 Sun – Serene – I know it isn’t all worn out – Leonard + Emil + D.J. + I went on a picnic –

1942 MON

1943 TUES FINISHED UP THE DAMN’ MARKET CALLS; DOROTHY STARTED ME RIGHT OUT WRITING CAPTIONS… I GET SO MAD and I SHOULDN’T, I KNOW…

OCTOBER 11

1939 Wed Carp asked me to go to the banquet with him. Now I don’t know what to do. – Suppose it will be Bob. I like both of the fellows. – shouldn’t want to hurt either.

1940 1:00 Thank you, God, for letting me have moment like I’ve had today… For just being able to sit downstairs (like I was a minute ago) with Bob + Leonard… just incoherently grateful for their presence… For having fun with a different W.W. in Sioux City… for riding home with Ray + Wyman. And for Leonard.

1941 Sat Convocation (which I didn’t make) Variety show – banquet (programs + flowers) Game – 66-6 – Show – Boyer

1942 SUN 12:05 (Well, it’s about time I started writing in here again!) Today would have been lovely if Eleanor hadn’t turned neurotic at Breakfast! I went to church by myself. (but met Bob) Granskau was wonderful. Tea this afternoon with Chils + Marie – And Bob Rief + I went out to school to see Mr. Eide’s stuff tonight.

1943 MON Time! Time! Time! – Oh God – I wish I were free of it… I read Thomas Wolfe today… which shouldn’t be done by the clock! … Weezie + Peg were so slow they missed their chance for dates… my cover proofs are good!

OCTOBER 10

1939 Tues Invited gals to a luncheon for Sat. Finally got a letter sent off to Nessa – began to tell her about things. – Bob is going to take me to the banquet, etc. – Ray is in town! –

1940 12:00 I AMAZE MYSELF… FELT DOPEY ALL day… now swell… I suppose I SHOULD STAY UP + WORK SOME MORE, BUT THEN I MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO GET UP + GO TO SIOUX CITY TOMORROW. AND I WANT A LITTLE SPARKLE LEFT FOR RAY + “BABE” – I’LL BE GLAD TO SEE THEM… HOPE EVERYTHING “CLICKS’ – PHONED MOTHER TONIGHT. I GUESS SHE IS BETTER.

1941 Friday – Coronation. Felt glad because I helped Bob + in the deal – Booful. – Gold, cinnamon brown. Wilma is here.

1942 SAT Mother sewed the buttons on, so I could wear my red dress to the game (It’s nothing short of sensational!) I hadn’t expected to go, but we went with Harold ( I don’t like him) + June and assimilated Ruth and L afterward – slightly chaotic! !

1943 SUN YES, VIC WAS HERE RIGHT AT 9:00… HE’S INSANE… (HE’S STILL TALKING IN THE SAME VEIN)… WE FOOLED AROUND ALL MORNING… I GOT CLEANED UP + WE HAD DINNER AT THE G-RAIL – A NICE ONE… I WALKED HIM BACK TO J. JAY AT 5:45… HE IS SWEET; I DON’T WANT TO MESS ANYTHING UP FOR HIM, I’M SURE… I READ A LITTLE, BATHED + WASHED M’ HAIR.

OCTOBER 9

1939 Mon – down at H.S. – (practice teaching looms up!) Printed posters to-day. Bob informed me that M. Allan considers my attitude toward Marie as revoltingly patronizing. - !! – I’m trying to make up to Marie for what she seems to be getting from the rest of the girls.

1940 11:00 – I feel very alive – almost normal… must be I’m tired… worked at school tonight for a while… Blanche + I guzzled cokes + talked about my l. life as usual… must be my desire for vicarious experience popping up again… Hell of a teaching day. –

1941 Thurs Hello stoopid – Nobody but a dumdum like you would forget about the heater for about 4 hours! – or be so slow getting started about reducing – Maybe you don’t know it, Babe, but that piece of peach pie was last pastry you’re going to eat for some time.

1942 FRI Leonard + I helped Bob with the stage until 6:30. Honestly, I don’t know how he’d have finished. Leonard broke down + asked me to go; Bob + Ruth Kingsberry went with us afterward in to the maelstrom of the PALACE; then we went over to ALL SAINTS and talked in the Discussion parlor.

1943 SAT I SLEPT LATE… WE HAD BRUNCH LATE SCRAMBLED EGGS + TOAST… THEN LOIS, WEEZY + I WENT FOR A FERRY BOAT RIDE TO STATEN ISLAND – SAW THE BIG BOATS IN THE SUNSHINE + WIND… THE STATUE of LIBERTY… VIC CALLED ABOUT SIX – CAME OVER ABOUT 7:00 MINUS A MOLAR, PLUS A FEW BEERS, AND WE WENT TO WATCH ON THE RHINE. HE ASKED ME TO MARRY HIM. #4

OCTOBER 8

1939 Sunday again. – It wasn’t so bad as usual, at least there was a foot-ball poster to design + cut just to break the monotony (and drive me crazy!)

1940 12:00 WELL, imagine, I almost enjoyed myself to-night. I was sort of dreading to go to the “Teacher Bridge Club” And it turned out not grim at all.. Still don’t feel like I belong though… God, if I can live through these next five days + accomplish something, I shall be grateful! –

1941 Wed Wonder if anyone else besides me realized there were 4 of us who have dated L. over at Mary Hanson’s tonight. They are certainly sweet gals – I’m tired – Oi – That Lecture –

1942 THURS Designed the letterhead for the CLUB’s stationary… had lunch with Mr. Spitznagel + Don Douthit. Dug up Durwood folks to audition for them… Caught only a fleeting glimpse of LEONARD today… wonder if he feels a little ashamed – the way I do – about last night

1943 FRI WE WENT TO Early to Bed… (I’D LIKE TO BE IN JUST ONE PRODUCTION SOME TIME)… QUELLE DAMOSELLES… WE WENT TO Martini’s AFTERWARD… WITH SOME FRIENDS OF HERMAN’S. – I LIKED AL – I TALKED TO TWO MIDSHIPMEN, WHILE WAITING IN HOPES OF SEEING VIC… THEY WANT DATES FOR THE DANCE! I WON TONIGHT! ! !

OCTOBER 7

1939 First game to-day – Philo – sold feathers. – Saw Roger K. – he certainly looks marvelous. – Went to “The Women” to-night.

1940 11:00 aha, Monday’s over! – gee, it wasn’t bad at all… I think I’ll just give up trying to be mean… I might as well salvage my disposition. – Worked all day. Betty has fixed a meeting tomorrow with a fella whose interested in me. Hope he pans out!

1941 Tues Full moon – fooey. (And I don’t have a homecoming date! ) – Worked all day – Heard from Lorraine + Alberta + Mrs. H. – like to go to L. Mars for homecoming! – Tom Holton ended up the way I expected – in prison! – I feel awful about it.

1942 WED LEONARD SAYS I WOULD LIKE TO “FLOAT ON A SEA OF SENSATION ALL THE TIME – WOULDN’T I?” HE CAME BY AFTER CLASS… IT WAS REALLY TOO LATE, I SUPPOSE, BUT I’D DO IT AGAIN, I THINK. IT WAS LIKE A “WARM BATH” outside

1943 THURS IT WAS ACTUALLY QUITE FUN, THE FEDERATION, I MEAN… WE HAD DRINKS FIRST. DOROTHY + I HAD NO COMPETITION… JOHN + WALTER WERE GOOD DATES… $70,000 WAS RAISED, SUCH MONEE… WENT TO ASTOR BAR AFTERWARD – I PARTED MY HAIR IN THE MIDDLE. FEEL ITALIAN RENAISSANCE.

OCTOBER 6

1939 My mind is a mess! – Last night is all a nightmare… I hope I can sleep tonight… Sara, Marg + I went to S.F. College Coronation.

1940 10:30 Well, I WASTED TODAY VERY PLEASANTLY. ATE HOT BISCUIT FOR BREAKFAST WENT TO CHURCH COMMUNION SUNDAY – I WAS SO GLAD I WENT) WITH MRS. REEVES… WAS QUITE LONELY FOR MOTHER… HAD BOILED DINNER WITH REEVES… WENT TO “NO TIME FOR COMEDY” WITH MARV + EVA… IT WAS SWELL… ROC PLAYED KIND OF WOMAN I ASPIRE TO BE. WROTE 4 LETTERS TONIGHT… LIVE FOR WK-END –

1941 11:00 (Well, I’m a compromiser from way back – didn’t do all my exercises!-) Wish I could just talk w/ Leonard. – Busy, busy day (pooey) – classes – Ladies Auxiliary (migosh) lamb chops – criticized drawing of Hal Bowlings - coked – ironed + ironed + ironed

1942 TUES BABY, YOU’RE REALLY UNPREDICTABLE… I WAS PREPARED FOR A QUIET EVENING AT HOME; YOU CAME OVER AND SPIRITED ME OFF to THE DANCE… BUT YOU CAN DO WHAT YOU WANT with ME WHEN YOU MAKE ME FEEL THE WAY I DID to-NIGHT AND TELL ME THAT YOU love ME ! !

1943 FELT RAT-

OUT IN THE MARKET, AGAIN…

OCTOBER 5

1939 10:10 Marie has been perfect… I don’t think I could have stood it if she hadn’t… The next headache is a H.C. date! I have been trying to soak out some of my mixed emotions in a hot bath – God, what hell you have to go through just for a lousy home-coming… There has been some discussion as to whether the gals like the colors + their gowns after the whole thing has been decided! I wish Ray were here!

1940 9:30 Just one more disappointment. No D.J. – Got a telegram this afternoon, but no details. I can’t imagine what would keep her from coming… Today, I’m afraid, saw nothing very important accomplished… I went bike-riding with some high school girls… I’m afraid I really don’t give a damn about the public opinion…

1941 Sun (What’ll I wear tomorrow?) I’ve aroused a few latent good intentions again… Know one reason I’m so discontented w/ myself is my weight! Cloudy – no Gable + Lombard – special fr. Eleanor

1942 MON MR. WITMER UPPED IT TO $25.00; BUT I STILL SAID NO… MAYBE I’M NUTS, I DON’T KNOW…

1943 TUES Finally wrote to Leonard. – Was out in markets all day. (Mrs. Stote does not handle me right!) Go to bed early, dummy!

OCTOBER 4

1939 11:30 tore around all day, cutting classes right + left. – We picked out patterns + material – silver lame + black moire It was my idea. I hope the gals like it. Krause read some of his verse to-night

1940 10:30 And another meeting of the “THANK GOD ITS FRIDAY” Club has had another session… Gee, I think I’m a lousy teacher… Hazel W. told me that Bob R. says I’m the “best teacher he ever had” – which is a pretty bad sign. D.J. is coming tomorrow. Hope we have fun…

1940 Put my hair in a bang – maybe it’ll lift my morale. – which was quite low until I took a booful nap this aft. Spitz was out. – he’s swell – Chils took us to dinner + a show.

1942 SUN WENT DOWN TO THE TRAIN… WE ALL MADE IT IN SPITE of BEING UP SO LATE… LEONARD + John HAD BREAKFAST WITH HIM… Leonard WILL MISS BOB A GREAT DEAL, AND VICE VERSA… WE ALL WILL… WENT TO CHURCH WITH VIRGINIA – THE EPISCOPAL Church… IT RAINED…

1943 MON Much singing tonight… It was gay fun… I had strongly intended to go to bed, but not when they started in singing Rawshin songs! – Sent the Prophet to Don Gregory – And, coincidentally heard from him, he’s 20 months in New Guinea

OCTOBER 3

1939 and here it is “tomorrow” – I’ve been to hell + back again. – For a while, I really thought I was going to be Queen – Then when I brought my little envelope home and opened it up to an apparently blank sheet of paper! – but it wasn’t blank – Marie is Queen

1940 GA, BUT I’M WOOZY, CAN HARDLY HOLD UP THE HEAD… FINISHED THEM DAMN OLE THEMES (REACTION TO CORRECTING GRAMMAR ERRORS) WISH I COULD HAVE HAD MY WALK AGAIN TONIGHT… 2ND PERIOD ASSEMBLY WAS BAD…. I MUST CLAMP DOWN. BUT GEE, I DON’T BLAME ANY OF THEM FOR WHAT THEY DO… I’M A LUCKY TEACHER!

1941 – GEE, THE “U” GAME – WHAT A BIG DISAPPOINTMENT! – I WAS W/ MARIE + CLARA – FELT HORRIBLE ALL DAY. DIDN’T GET AROUND TO CASHING CHECK. I’M A MESS.

1942 SAT. HA! – WE BEAT THEM! … VERY satisfactory EVENING WE WERE ALL TOGETHER: SHIRLEE + BILL [AFTER SOME DIFFICULTY, I GUESS]… D.J. + BOB [LeonardGOT DONNA FOR BOB] … AND Leonard + ME… WE LINGERED LOVINGLY AT THE PALACE FOR AGES… SAT OUT IN FRONT FOR A TIME, too

1943 SUN CALLED ON LOIS + SULLY. MET ROG – A SOLID CITIZEN… I TOOK VIC TO DINNER IT WAS NICE. HE’S CERTAINLY DIFFERENT. THAN WHAT HE WAS…

OCTOBER 2

1939 Well, tomorrow at this time, I reckon I’ll know if I’m eliminated – or an attendant – or (miracle of miracles) the other! I observed down at H.S. all morning – I’ll be under Lois Cowan

1940 PHOOEY, I’M GOING TO BED. I SPOSE I’LL BE SORRY TOMORROW… BUT WHEN IS TOMORROW? – AFTER DINNER TONIGHT I TOOK THE KEENEST WALK… NIGHT WAS WINDY, RAINY, PERFECT – WENT CLEAR OUT TO A HILL… A PERFECT CLIMAX I KNEW IT WOULD LOOK THE WAY IT DID… STARRY SOUTH… THE TOWN, LOW, SHINING, LIGHTED –

1941 Babe, what you need is a big dose of self-respect! ! And you’re not doing a damn thing about getting it! ! Okay okay okay!

1942 FRI I ASKED BOB OVER FOR DINNER. Wished I COULD HAVE ASKED Leonard too! – GEE, IF ONLY DAD HADN’T SAID + DID WHAT HE DID THIS summer! – SHIRLEY THOUGHT I WAS BEING DOUBLE X’ed – IT TURNED OUT TO BE HER. Leonard WOULDN’T GO WITH HAROLD + BILL – HA…

1943 SAT GEE, BUT WE HAD FUN; BUT I’M WORRIED VIC IS TAKING THIS SERIOUSLY – TOO MUCH SO. AND HE MUSN’T… PERHAPS HE JUST HAD A LITTLE TOO MUCH TO DRINK… WE HAD A SWELL DINNER – MANHATTANS FIRST – CHICKEN + CHOCOLATE CAKE… (+ VIC’S ICE CREAM!)… AND TO THE WALDORF – TSK TSK.

OCTOBER 1

1939 Sun. And I swore I would never spend another Sunday like this one! – The moon came up yellow and full. It didn’t hurt so badly when it got higher + was paler. –

1940 12:30 MY GOLLY, HERE I’M NOT THROUGH CORRECTING THOSE DAMN TESTS YET… I’LL NEVER GET CAUGHT UP! – A VISIT FROM MR. C. TODAY. I WAS OVERRUN WITH FEARS + TREPIDATIONS! – BUT ALL WAS OKAY… LANDED IN MLLE AGAIN. LOOKED PRETTY GOOD… TODAY WAS PRETTY SUCCESSFUL FOR A CHANGE!

1941 (Mlle, this year, is without me.) – It looks as if I will have enough time this year to really make something of myself! – (Can I do it?) Went to Cr. Wr. – Emil, Bill Wilbur + I went to Looks – fun

1942 THURS LEONARD AND JOHN AND BOB CAME BY TONIGHT AND TOOK ME DOWN TO Look’s WITH THEM… WE ABSORBED BOB BERG and BOB RIEF, too… LEONARD GOT QUITE A SHOCK, I GUESS; DIDN’T SUSPECT I KNEW ANY “RIVAL” MATERIAL! WE TALKED and TALKED – Hemingway + hunger + company

1943 FRI OH GOD, HERE WE GO AGAIN! – PART OF HIM I LOATHE, PART I LIKE… I HOPE SOME REAL ISSUE ARISES THAT WE DIFFER UPON… WE SAW “TOMORROW THE WORLD” AND WENT DOWN TO THE VANGUARD… GAVE SOME MORE BLOOD TO THE RED CROSS. BOUGHT JOHN’S GIFT, FINALLY. ACCOMPLISHED A LITTLE. SAW VIC FOR A WHILE. Heard from Mother + Leonard.